The Slither of Tiny Adders
by AssassinOfRome
Summary: Teen!Characters. George joins Mrs Miggins Boarding School and meets some friends who he has some wild capers with. First story in this context so be kind with any reviews. Rated T for room. Written for my brother. I hope you enjoy my story. More coming.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello, I'm AssassinOfRome *waves nervously* This is my first Blackadder Fanfiction so it may not be brilliant. I usually write Sherlock and Sherlock Holmes fanfics so check those out if you want. This is set in the modern times and is written from Blackadder's POV. I hope that I will be able to write some more of this fanfiction and maybe another one. Well I have nothing more to say than enjoy! AOR**

Monday mornings were by far the worst day of the week. You have to get up, forget everything you did at the weekend and to top it all off, you have to go to school. In my case, I don't ever leave school seeing as I live there. But weekends at boarding school are majorly better than the weekdays. I sighed, pulling my school books out of my bag and laying them in the desk. Something was different today, though. A rather tall skinny boy stood at the front of the classroom, staring at the floor with his big tawny coloured Bambi eyes. He was flicking his brown fringe in a way that was deemed 'cool'. I, myself, wasn't 'cool' and neither was my somehow best friend, Baldrick. I glanced around. Everyone was staring at the boy, books on their desk. I guess you could say everyone's books and bags reflected their personality. My books were well thumbed through and my bag was presentable but not flashy. Baldrick didn't have a bag and his books had loose pages and were covered in mud. The text was unreadable but this didn't matter as I had a sneaking suspicion that Baldrick couldn't read. Percy, my other friend who sat directly in front of me and always had his chair in kicking range, was not a big reader either. His books were covered in doodles and his bag was a black Nike backpack very similar to mine except for the fact that mine was embossed with a green snake wound round a dagger and the name tag read 'Edmund Blackadder' and not 'Percy Percy'. Yes, this is unfortunatley his real name. Another friend of mine, Flashheart, had a bag that was flashy but not at all presentable. Mrs Miggins began to talk so I tore my attention away from Percy's bag and stared at her instead.

"Good Morning Class." She smiled at us. At me, even. She was weird. No one liked her.

"Good Morning, Mrs Miggins." we chorused back at her.

"Now class we have a new student with us today. It's his firs day so I hope you will all be extra kind to him. Our new student who has been placed in the Cambell dorm." I swore under my breath. Just my luck to be loaded with the new boy in my already testorone filled dorm. It already had five other fourteen-year-olds but I had heard that Ashford had the maximum of seven already and they were the only other boys room. "What your name?" The old bat croaked.

"George. My name is George." the boy squeaked. Any atmosphere of coolness dissolved. I realised that he was only flicking his hair because it had grown rather rapidly over his eyes and needed a good cut. I groaned. He was definetly worthy of being my friend. I was friends with the uncoolest losers in the entire class.

"What's your last name, George?" George bit his tounge and blushed a violent shade of pink.

"Colthurst St Barleigh." The class exploded into laughter. Even Baldrick was chuckling. I kept my face straight and whacked Baldrick around the head. George saw this and smiled hopefully at me. I grinned back.

"Now George." Mrs Miggins was struggling to keep her face straight. "Why don't you go and sit next to Percy." George, still blushing, picked up his bag and walked over to Percy's desk.

"Erm...hello. You must be Percy."

"Yes." Percy answered. "And these are my friends Blackadder and Baldrick." I shook hands with George and he shook hands with Balrick. "You're in our dorm."

"Well ding dong with knobs on." George grinned. We all stared at him.

"Did you really just say that?" Baldrick asked.

George looked down sadly. "Yes."

"Shush at the back!" Mrs Miggins cried. "Now let's do the register."


	2. Chapter 2

To be fair, we weren't very kind to George on his first night at Cambell dorm. As soon as he walked in, we pounced on him, took his bags and began to paw through his stuff. George gave up trying to reclaim his things quite quickly and sat on the end of his bed, waiting to be ridiculed and asking me everyone's name.

"I'm Edmund but most people call me Blackadder. This is Baldrick, my best friend. I don't really know why. This is my other best friend Percy and his cousin, Darling is over there with Melchett."

"I thought I told you to stop calling me Darling! My name's Kevin."

"Oh shush, Darling. You've got to help me find something incriminating." Melchett grinned. He was a rather tall well muscled boy and it was unlike him to take pleasure in harassing another student though he seemed to be enjoying it in this case. Suddenly, the sound of squealing girls erupted from outside.

"Always a pleasure Flash. How many girls was it today?" I asked.

"Fourteen...hey there's a new kid!"

"Yes, Flash. Weren't you paying attention in class?"

"Does he ever?" Percy laughed.

"Flash, this is George. George, this is Flash."

"Hi." George extended his hand. Flash stared at him for a second then punched him in the face causing him to fall rather heavily onto the floor. Flash put his foot on the skinny boy's chest.

"Are you a poof?" he asked. George, looking confused, didn't answer. Flash pushed down. George gasped in pain.

"Are you gay?"

"What? No!"

Flash released his foot. "Oh good. I'm Flashheart."

"I gathered that." George gasped. He rubbed his oxygen-deprived chest and tried to get some air back into his lungs by bending over. His brown eyes turned quizzical as he stared up at me.

"Does he do that to everyone?"

I laughed. "Yes. You should have seen what he did to the people who said yes. Well Darling is an example."

"Hey!" Darling objected. "I'm straight!"

"As a roundabout." I muttered. George grinned as he straightened up. "Are you alright?"

He nodded. Melchett made a strange triumphant bleat. Everyone turned around to see him holding up a photo album. He began to flick through it.

"Who's she?" Darling pointed to a short girl about our age with glasses and a black fringe.

"That's my sister."

"Oh. Well who's she?" He pointed to a girl with long blond hair and amber eyes.

"That's my cousin."

"Well who's that?" Baldrick, who was standing behind Melchett and Darling pointed to the page.

"That's my rabbit..."

"Well you have a sexy rabbit. What's it called?" Percy asked.

George blushed. "Flossy. My sister came up with the name. But... it's a boy."

The dorm went silent. George lifted his hands and twitched them in a strange movement.

"Awkward Turtle."

Darling nodded.

"Too true."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3 here as demanded for by PeachySmoothies. This is kinda my revision for an English exam I have soon. They haven't given us anything to revise with but I think this'll probably help. From the computer of a very tired, very bored AOR. **

Breakfast was always served at 7 am but everyone had to be awake and dressed by 6 for a dorm inspection. Everytime Darling, in his pajamas opened the curtains (I always knew it was him; he was always awake first. Git) and the light streamed directly into my eyes (Disadvantages of getting the bed next to the window. But in the summer when we had the window open, I was always the coolest.), I always awoke with a groan. Today, even though this all happened, I was slightly curious. Would George wake early or sleep in and get into trouble? I was disappointed when I saw him awake but my curiosity was not extinguished. He wasn't blinking tiredly or rubbing his eyes like everyone else in the room. He was smiling perkily but there were bags under his eyes. I felt stupid for not making any connection at that point at all but it really was too early for rational thought. I sighed, got up and grabbed my clothes for the shower. George didn't follow. I saw he was already dressed.

"Did you get a shower?" I asked.

He nodded firmly. "I always do."

"I didn't hear you." Percy mused.

"Me neither." Melchett replied, kicking a groaning Flashheart on the arm, which trailed on the floor, to wake him up. Flash was usually up all night studying. He was quite clever for someone who never paid attention in anything. "Darling, did you?"

"I did actually. Everyone was asleep but me and George."

"Why were you awake then?" My eyes flicked between the two early birds.

"I live in the country." George answered. "I always get up early. Force of a habit."

"And you know me Blackadder, I just do."

"You guys better hurry up; we do actually have lessons today!" Percy sighed.

"What are we doing?" George asked perkily. I groaned at his enthusiasm and pulled my timetable out of my blazer pocket. I handed it to him and sauntered into the shower.

The Breakfast Hall, as always, was loud and full of people. Each dormitory had its own table. Ours, Cambell, was right next to Heath, the smallest girl's dorm. It consisted of some strange characters. There was the over excitable but very pretty Elizabeth, or Queeine as we all called her, Queenie's lackey Bernard who was a small dumpy girl who was slightly scary, a soppy girly-girl named Amy and Kate, who everyone called Bob for some reason. No one was really sure why. She didn't even look like a boy. She was just... there weren't really any words to describe her. She was pretty; no doubt about that. But she was plain and a little boring. I greeted them as I always did.

"Morning, my ladies."

They turned and stared at me, giggling.

"Good Morning Edmund. Who's your new friend?" They peered over my shoulder at George who was staring round at all the people in awe. For an upper-class boy, he did seem a little out of place. I put an arm around the taller boy and steered him towards the girls.

"This is George. George, these are the girls. Queeine, Bernard, Amy and Kate." I announced.

"Hello." He whispered shyly.

Queenie stared at him, struggling to remember something. The penny dropped and her face lit up. "You're the one with the funny surname!" The other girls tittered at the memory whilst George went scarlet in embarrassment.

"Don't diss him, girls." I said defensively. George sat down and looked up at me.

"Do we have to do anything before...?"

I shook my head. "No. Go on. You can eat."

George smiled, clamped his hands together and shut his eyes, muttering something inaudible.

"What are you doing?" Melchett asked.

"I'm saying Grace." Melchett looked confused.

"He's praying to God." Darling replied, sighing.

"Really?" Flash asked, interested. "Last thing I heard, he started praying to me!" He stood up on the bench aligned against the table and thrust his pelvis forward. "WOOF WOOF!" He barked. The girls tittered. George looked surprised. Everyone turned to look at him.

"You're Christian."

"Yup. Always have been always will."

"Cool." I munched my cereal thoughtfully. George lightly buttered some toast and nibbled it in silence.


End file.
